Allen Impersonator Detained, Guard Returns to Lineup

Prior to game 5 of the Celtics-Pistons Conference Champioship series, Ray Allen was freed from the basement of Pat “Sully” Sullivan of Quincy Massachusetts and finally, after several weeks in captivity, returned to the Celtics line up.

Sullivan, a 23 year old factory worker and graduate of Umass Dartmouth was charged with the kidnapping of the Celtics all-star after the police were tipped off by, according to Sullivan, “my buddy Murph who lives ovah in Southie. The guy had one too many Sam Summuhs and started talkin to the cops.”

It is assumed that Allen was kidnapped prior the first round playoff series between the Celtics and the Atlanta Hawks where the guard’s production suddenly disappeared.

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