Nicholas O'Malley's New England Patriots Fan Profile

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Celtics Notes! posted on 06/01/2008

Allen Impersonator Detained, Guard Returns to Lineup

Prior to game 5 of the Celtics-Pistons Conference Champioship series, Ray Allen was freed from the basement of Pat “Sully” Sullivan of Quincy Massachusetts and finally, after several weeks in captivity, returned to the Celtics line up.

Sullivan, a 23 year old factory worker and graduate of Umass Dartmouth was charged with the kidnapping of the Celtics all-star after the police were tipped off by, according to Sullivan, “my buddy Murph who lives ovah in Southie. The guy had one too many Sam Summuhs and started talkin to the cops.”

It is assumed that Allen was kidnapped prior the first round playoff series between the Celtics and the Atlanta Hawks where the guard’s production suddenly disappeared.

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Maybe I'll Finish This One... posted on 04/26/2008

Ok, in honor of my editor restoring my interest in actually, you know, typing things on this website, I'm going to post something.

This is for my loving fanbase... all three of you.

So, today was the draft. And all people care about that happens in the draft come down to a few things:

-Who got picked first (Which sucks nowadays since we find out like, 3 days before. Cuz y'know, screw suspense)

-Who's the poor asshole that got invited to the draft and had to sit in the green room for like, 4 hours before he gets picked as his dreams are slowly crushed in front of a national television audience that wants nothing more to see him cry. (Didn't even happen this year. Come on NFL, who invites people that actually get picked?)

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This Thing Is Broken posted on 04/24/2008

I swear, I'm gonna figure this out. 

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Whatever Happened to Originality? posted on 03/29/2008

There's an episode of the Simpsons were the Homer-coached Springfield Wildcats are preparing for a game and Homer lends his hand in leading a cheer for his squad.

 "Who are we? The Wildcats! Who're we gonna beat? The Wildcats!"

 Such a situation, unlike most things founf in the Simpsons, is not that unlikely to occur in the world of sports, especially in this year's Men's NCAA Basketball tournament. Come with me on an adventure while we take a glance at this year's teams. (Also mentioned in my Daily Collegian article.)

The Wildcats:

The Wildcat is an anomaly. It's probably the most comon mascot in college sports, but it really doesn't refer to one thing. It really makes no sense to base your mascot on a non-domestic feline. The Wildcat, however, is an improvement over the headscratchers such as a bearcat (a what?).

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I Don't Even Care About Work Anymore posted on 03/23/2008

I'm just gonna go out and say i'm writing this out of pure joy.

 I've previously stated my obsession with the phenomenon that is the goalie fight. In my opinion, it is the single greatest event that has been bestowed to us fans by the realm that is sports.

So it is in my infinite happiness that I present this video.

http://communities.canada.com/theprovince/blogs/kurtenblog/archive/20

I'm too excited and lazy to make this smaller or look better. I just want to write this and go on with my life and be happy, which is what that link does.

Not only does it involve the legendary goalie fight, it involves a goalie that is looking for a fight like a hobo looks for a sammich in the trash. He wants it, and he wants it NOW

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